and i don't know where i am today except that i just took a long walk to Starbucks, by that i mean, down some alleys and danced a little and looked at some gnarly flowers (flowers are not smooth like in children's pictures. they're vinous and furry and gnarled.)and i passed store fronts and cars cars cars going going going. a store front with rugs. a store front with meditation paraphernalia and books and books and books on how to find peace. a store front with records. a store front with pink sandles and ruffled pink tops and flowy skirts. a store front with children looking smart and text that read, let your child amaze you. and there were samples of their tests laid out for all to see. and a store front with lizards and bunnies. looking. looking. looking. doing exactly what they would do in their natural habitat, but behind glass and the lizard opened it's mouth and displayed its nearly white tongue for me and smiling displayed its rows of saw teeth. and it's orange eye looked. and looked. and the hole in it's head that looked like it was covered with a dryer sheet to keep dust out was listening, i think. and the tiniest and biggest spikes all over were malleable and it's throat would puff. and i fucking screamed. i stared at that thing and said, it's an alien. it's an alien! and it's doing stuff to me through the glass. it's playing with my mind through the glass!! and i flew back onto the sidewalk holding my head "aaahhhh! arrrrrrr. ooowww!" and some people laughed and some people tried to help me calm down. and some people turned their heads and walked on. then i walked across the street to where moms where making plans and yuppies half-basked and half-squinted their faces wrinkling up against their mortality. and the sun blazed and tunnel vision went my eyes to two children. the girl was on the bench getting wierded out and joyfully so at her brother who was leaning over the back of the bench lyaayying at her and leaning over her and then lar lar lar yar ylraring at her again and i could only imagine that his eyes were doing something totally crazy too at her as she leaned away from him saying, "eeeeeeee. aaayyyy ll" and the people that were my size were doing robotic squinting brain things about what the day would be like if we did this or if we did that and what do we have to do, let's figure that out first. but i stared at the kids. i stared at them. i stopped in my tracks loosely pinching my two floppy dollars. i was outside of the starbucks store. i did not go into the starbucks store but i stared at them. and i stared. and i stared as they lollygargled on the bench and the birds sang and the grown-ups made plans. and then i took a deep quick split second breath and then with the force of a fire truck let out a roar at those kids, my eyes lit up like a dragon's. they screamed and jumped clear from the bench and and started running the opposite direction. i took one leap toward the bench, one leap on top of the bench where a mom sat hard in her sunglasses next to her buggy and one leap over the bench as she said "hey!" and i, despite the calls and confused cries of the big people that their children had disappeared and a stranger, was running after them, i ran.
the threshold to the alley shook, and i was there alone. in the alley. my hands and feet were smaller and less vinous; my eyes fell on a different part of the buildings. the big people who had been chasing me and had shaken through the threshold themselves were small too. their clothes baggy on them. the girls had dropped their large heavy purses and blinked at them. blinked at me. we stood there blinking at each other.
one boy began to huff and puff and huff and puff and huff and puff and huff and puff and we looked at him and he huffed and puffed and squealed and squealed and flew into a rage squealing and screaming: "yeah! YEAH!!. YEAH!! YEAHH! YEAHHHHHHH Y! Y! Y! YEAHHHHHHHHH." He stumbled and tripped out of his baggy clothes; big boxers dropped and he threw the tangle off of him and started pounding and beating on garage doors and running (yyyeeeahhhh!!!! . yeah yeah! YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! YEah!~ YeahYyyyyyYYY YY Y Y YY YY aaaaAAAAHHHH!!!!) and jumping up against garage doors all up and down the alley. jump pound beat. jump jump. jump pound. jump pound and powerfully clumsy beating.
We burst into laughter, some of us. some of us followed right away. some of us tried to follow but were laughing so hard we couldn't. goofy enveloped us. and we were tumbled and tossed screaming naked down the alley lyyllaarlyall yall yall-ing and jumping against garages and each other.
a big person came into view to call us onward to call us to task to call us into separate vans to click our belts and go go go to the stores and get get get things.
she had no air when she saw us. "what" is the only utterance she could utter at the tribal scene. Then she came to and started screaming with equal emphasis on the beginning of each word. what are you doing. and then a very fast get over here and then a deep and resounding now.
the boy and i had the same instinct, we sprinted toward her naked as the day we were born as she was born as all was first and then cut a hard right down the side walk sprinting as if our legs were twice as long and the big shouts followed. terrifying big shouts booming get back here.
with a one two three step something different was happening. i look down and my little feet were only skimming the ground and the boys little feet were all the way off the ground and we tilted and were tossed in to flight headlong into the wind like fish of the air. dodging bicyclists dogs big people like fish of the air. the big shouts stop. there are only shrill barks of dogs. then there is nothing but wind whipping past as we dive through the the air the wind hitting the top of my head and flapping down my hair. the wind rippling along my back and shooting off my feet and hands. we slip through.
i close my eyes gently and let the soaring wind-song envelop me and let it carry me.
the top of my head is smacked with pain darts and i am cold and fresh flopping around in the wet place. all is wet. swoo swoo spwoom zwoom zzooom! shlap! shlap shlap! three follow us. we pant. sniffle. bobbing in the waves, the light wind and seagulls in a sonic dance. and there is giggling and splashing and the light wind and seagulls in a sonic dance.
there's a hint of a wonder breezing in my mind about where i am exactly. and how i got here. it waxes and wanes and we splash we splash. we play and we float. the sky is definitely bright blue. and one cloud floats in reflection. we float. we float. we float.